Did you know that loneliness is just as bad for your health as smoking? And even more disconcerting: as we age, it’s more challenging to find and cultivate true friendships!
New research shows that “Stable, healthy friendships are crucial for our well-being and longevity. People who have friends and close confidants are more satisfied with their lives and less likely to suffer from depression.”
Jesus’ life offers powerful insights into what true friendship looks like. By examining His approach, we can learn how to build deeper, more meaningful connections.
1. Invest Deeply
Jesus had many followers, twelve apostle, and three intimate friends.
While Jesus was still speaking, some people came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue leader. “Your daughter is dead,” they said. “Why bother the teacher anymore?” Overhearing what they said, Jesus told him, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.” He did not let anyone follow him except Peter, James and John the brother of James. Mark 5:35-37
Live it out:
Jesus invited Peter, James, and John to participate in his life and ministry in both the highs (the Transfiguration) and the lows (The Garden of Gethsemane and when he processed the death of Jairus’ daughter).
Building intimacy with friends takes time and intentionality. Jesus’ example shows us both that can be truly vulnerable with our friends – and that we don’t need to extend that to everyone around us.
2. Love Selflessly
Jesus consistently prioritized serving his friends.
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” John 15:13
Live it out:
Look for opportunities to support your friends, even when inconvenient. It could be as simple as being there when they need to talk or helping them with a task or sending a quick text to check in. These small acts of kindness are one easy way to model your life after Jesus.
3. Share Openly
Jesus opened up and created an environment where His friends would too.
“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15
Live it out:
Jesus chose to share about how God was working in the world with his friends, so follow His lead by sharing about how God is working in your life. If you’ve seen God show up in a beautiful way, answer a prayer, or challenge you to grow, let your friends see how God is continuing to grow your faith in Him.
4. Be a spiritual cheerleader
Jesus helped his friends to grow, especially in their faith.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
Live it out:
Be there to celebrate your friends’ successes and support them during tough times. Choose to be the friend that people know will turn to prayer and Scripture.
Keep your eyes on Jesus so that your friendship comes from the overflow of your heart.
Put it into Practice.
By following Jesus’ example, our friendships will become deeply fulfilling relationships that reflect His unconditional love.
If you are having a hard time making friends – I’d love to meet with you! I’ll be teaching a Bible study at Cherry Hills Church the fall and would love to invite you to join us.
